@ 15/08/06 – 17:56:53
I have sat here in tears.
Finally hit me that tomorrow we are burying a much loved family member. Today I have finally found out the reason for my mood, I am grieving. Tomorrow I will get through the service with dignity and be the shoulder for everyone else. Fortunately hubby will be there.
At the moment I feel the laughter has died inside me. I don't feel my bubbly, cheery, giggly self at all.
But I will be back!
@ 15/08/06 – 16:47:12
Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed that Heaven will only admit 33% of applicants today. The admissions standard: Who died the worst death? So, St. Peter takes each of the three men aside in
turn and asks them how they died.
First man: "I'd been suspecting for a long time that my wife was cheating on me. I decided to come home early from work one afternoon and check to see if I could catch her in the act. When I got back to my apartment, I heard the water running. My wife was in the shower. I looked everywhere for the guy, but couldn't find anyone or any trace that he had been there. The last place I looked was out on the balcony.
I found the bastard hanging from the edge, trying to get back in! So I started jumping up and down on his hands, and he yelled, but he didn't fall. So I ran inside and got a hammer, and crushed his fingers with it until he fell twenty-five floors screaming in agony. But the fall didn't kill the asshole. He landed in some bushes! So I dragged the refrigerator from the kitchen (it weighed about a ton), pulled it to the balcony, and hurled it over the edge. It landed right on the guy and killed him. But then I felt so horrible about what I had done, I went back into the bedroom and shot myself."
St. Peter nodded slowly as the man recounted the story. Then, telling the first man to wait, he took the second aside.
Second man: "I lived on the twenty-seventh floor of this apartment building. I had just purchased this book on morning exercises and was practicing them on my balcony, enjoying the sunshine, when I lost my balance and fell off the edge. Luckily, I only fell about two floors before grabbing another balcony and holding on for dear life. I was trying to pull myself up when this guy came running onto what must have been his balcony and started jumping up and down on my hands. I screamed in pain, but he seemed really irate. When he finally stopped, I tried to pull myself up again, but he came out with a hammer and smashed my fingers to a pulp! I fell, and I thought I was dead, but I landed in some bushes. I couldn't believe my second stroke of luck, but it didn't last. The last thing I saw was this enormous refrigerator falling from the building down on top of me and crushing me."
St. Peter comforted the man, who seemed to have several broken bones. Then he told him to wait, and turned to the third man.
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Third man: "Picture this. You're hiding, naked, in a refrigerator..."
@ 15/08/06 – 15:01:23
Been to see three friends today. Two bent my ear about each other in the way friendships go, with me keeping stum about each other had said about each other (are you following) and trying to solve what is becoming a wider gap between them.
Then had lunch with another who was looking better than I have seen her in a long while as the poor thing has had to slow down due to breaking her leg and ankle. So we had a chat and put the world to rights as you do with good friendships, made some ham rolls and a cup of tea and talked about whatever came into our heads.
Came home, eldest has made me a lovely cup of tea and I am going to shove on some music at last and do some more sewing. 
Feeling a lot less gloomy than I was this morning now, it is true, it is good to talk!
@ 15/08/06 – 11:23:35
Ok slight exaggeration but popped to Sainsburys and saw the most gorgeous young firemen walking around getting food for what I persume one of them will be cooking for dinner later!
*Swoon*
Cheered me up a little
@ 15/08/06 – 07:51:05
Feeling a bit down and cheesed off today. Don't really know why, I shouldn't be but there is so much to do and the weather is getting on my nerves now when I have so much washing to get dry!
Have to visit a friend later and make her some lunch. She fell down the stairs and broke her leg and ankle and can't get around at the moment - thinking positive there is always someone worse off!
Hubby finally got round to hoovering stairs and landing, then used my towel when he had a bath! That really irritates me. Everyone has their own towels, I hate sharing. I know they haven't got anything catching it is just one of my many funny traits, sharing towels! Thing is he is deliberately doing it now as he knows it makes me annoyed and he was in one of his annoying moods yesterday as well!
Brilliant discussion on the radio. Children who are only children or eldest children cannot tell jokes, whereas younger siblings are very good at telling jokes! Oh well knew I was useless anyway as the eldest child, my sister was always the funny one when she wasn't having a temper tantrum!
Just to prove it, here is a joke:
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A: Because it was a double-crosser.
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