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Posts archive for: 24 October, 2006
  • This is brill!!

    To My Dear Wife:

    You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 54 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year-old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don't be upset - I shall be home before midnight."

    When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the dining room table:

    "My Dear Husband,

    I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 54 years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old.

    As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference: 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18.

    Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow."

  • Opinions

    Subville posted this and it looks interesting.....

    When you are in a monogamous relationship, what constitutes cheating?

    Confiding in a Friend of the Opposite Sex

    The Man's Opinion: Talk all you want.
    The Woman's Opinion: This is emotional cheating.
    Me: Sometimes to get someone elses opionion on things is quite good. Know when to stop, know when you can say too much and make sure it isn't a friend ofyour hubby or wife that isn't good!

    Dancing Closely

    The Man's Opinion: Get your hands off my girl.
    The Woman's Opinion: Watch who you're touching.
    Me: Nice dancer! but I am married and I am going home to my hubby now thank you.

    Flirting

    The Man's Opinion: It's all in good fun.
    The Woman's Opinion: Know when to draw the line.
    Me: Know when to draw the line.

    Going to Strip Clubs

    The Man's Opinion: Honey, this is what guys do!
    The Woman's Opinion: You can look but do not touch.
    Me: Look but don't touch.

    Cyber Sex

    The Man's Opinion: I like the real thing.
    The Woman's Opinion: Not only is it cheating, it's also pathetic.
    Me: Pathetic

    Watching Porn

    The Man's Opinion: It's a guy thing.
    The Woman's Opinion: Have fun.
    Me: Oh great some new films to watch, shall I open the wine?

    Engaging in a Sexual Act

    The Man's Opinion: Don't even think about it.
    The Woman's Opinion: Don't even think about it.
    Me: Don’t even think about it.

    What's your opinion?

  • All this talk of death

    Live each day as if it is your last.

    Enjoy it to the full

    There is one thing we can all gauarantee about life, we will end up dead! :)

  • My stupid score


    The Stupid Quiz said I am "Fairly Smart!" How stupid are you? Click here to find out!

  • Everyone else is doing it ......what the heck


    I am going to die at 78. When are you? Click here to find out!

    Said it was depressing!

  • A wandering I will go

    After a cold, grey, damp morning, the sun is now shining and it is really quite warm out. Doesn't seeing the sun shine make you feel better?

    Armed with mp3 player and layered up, I walked the 25mins to Homebase for those bin bags then decided on the way back to pop into Sainsburys for some veg to roast for tonights tea. Hubby and kids have something quick on Tuesdays and Thursdays (which he usually cooks) as they have their Martial Arts class, so I am going to do myself roasted veg with a jacket potato.

    All in all my walk took about 45 minutes. The sun shone, ppl were smiling (though that may have something to do with me singing along to my MP3 player) and the walk, though along a busy main road was quite pleasant. I have to admit half way round I did regret my decision as my calf muscles were really hurting, but I persevered.

    It is on days like today I wish I lived nearer the sea. To walk along the beach with the sea breeze around me and the sun shining is heaven. Of course if the weather had been this promising this morning I would have chucked the kids in the car and done the 2 hour drive to Hunstanton or Flexistowe (both within equal distance to me) and we would have had our walk along the beach, but alas with the torrential rain that started this morning it was not to be:(

    Never mind there is always tomorrow.

  • Tuesday Afternoon

    Wallowed in bed under the duvet till about ten, which is when I decided to drag myself from out of the covers - was feeling hungry!

    Decided to do some Pilates, 1 gold star for me!

    Yesterday stitched from noon till 11 last night constantly apart from the 2 hours I took off to cook some tea and eat it. Got to the part of stitching where you backstitch some details in - takes forever to follow but the head now has details and I have begun to stitch the background.

    Crap on telly - childrens telly is even worse, got to the point where I banned my youngest from watching Power Rangers - I swear if I heard that tune one more time I would scream! Watched two episodes of Charmed, 1 of Boston Legal then the film Practical Magic - watchable seen it several times but I just love Aidan Quinn in this film, his voice is so sexy.

    Oh well I have to walk down to Homebase now and get some bin bags as we seem to have run out of them again!

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