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Archives for: February 2007, 04

It has been a quiet day

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 20:47:27

On here that is.

you have all found that you have a life away from blogland and gone to enjoy it I hope:)

As for me, I have sat and vegetated. The housework, washing and ironing remains untouched due to the fact that I decided I was not the only person that was able to do any of these things in this house. of course by mid week I will be stressed out by it all and probably go on a mad cleaning spree, but until then I will just remain chilled about it all.

At the moment I am sitting here watching scuzz and kerrang (not at the same time I am flicking between the two), while hubby supervises Richard bathing (in other words playing Resident Evil IV while son takes a bath) and the other son is pretending to do some studying.

when they all emerge downstairs (no.1 son and hubby as Richard will have gone to bed) we will watch Dungeons and Dragons on DVD (groan, but did promise son he could see it).

So for now I bid you adieu and see you in the morning:)

for a change this has been going round my head all day

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 16:28:33


The Hit man

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 15:40:51

Two friends are just about to tee off at the first hole of their local

golf course when a third guy, carrying a golf bag calls out to them,

"Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

"Sure," they say, "You're welcome to play along with us."

So they start playing and enjoy the game and the company of the

newcomer.

Part way around the course, one of the friends asks the guy, "So, what

do you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man."

"You're joking!"

"No, I'm not," he says, reaching into his golf bag and pulling out a

beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight.

"Here are my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," says the other friend, "Can I

take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

So he picks up the rifle and looks through the sight in the section of

his house. "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic!

I can

see right in the window! Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. ... Ha

Ha,

I can see she's naked! God, she looks hot! Hey, What's that? Wait a

minute ... Hey, that's my next-door neighbor in there with her.....

What? He's naked, too!!

"Those no-good Sons of Bitches!!

He turns to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

"I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the

trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"

"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife. She's always had a big mouth, so shoot her in the

mouth, that'll shut her up. Then, the neighbour. I want you to just

shoot his cock off to teach him lesson."

The hit man takes out the rifle and takes aim, standing perfectly still

for about a minute.

"Are you going to do it or not?" asks the friend impatiently.

"Just wait a second ... be patient," says the hit man calmly, I think I

can save you a grand here....."

Hilarious letter!

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 15:35:20

Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
boyfriend along shopping .
This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in
Oxford:

Dear Mrs. Murray,

While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty
Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you
and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his
antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by
our surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
feminine products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and
told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a
Calor gas stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him,
he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the
antidepressants were.

10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming
the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practiced the "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.

12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker,
assumed the fetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices
again."

And; last, but not least:

14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a
while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."

Yours sincerely,

Charles Brown
Store Manager

Have a go at this quiz!

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 15:32:49

http://www.richstevens.com/flash/iq.swf

Post secret

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 15:24:38

I must admit I am getting addictive to this site http://www.postsecret.blogspot.com/

Once i log on on a Sunday I take a look.

And today there was something that made me think "Yes, I can relate to that"

Now I don't have a learning disability. I do have problems hearing sometimes but that wasn't at school. At school I was your average child, struggled to understand things, particularly maths and often told that I couldn't be that stupid as the teacher tried yet again to explain to me that days mathematical problem. In fact I struggle with most things but came out of school with good 'O' level results despite this and managed to get a job I enjoy doing (though stressful at times). But one thing it taught me was no child is stupid. Ok they have problems, they may struggle, they may be labelled with the latest problem e.g. dyslexia, autism etc, BUT they are not stupid they just have to learn at a different level. They have to be encouraged, nurtured and you need patience to do this. It is rewarding when any child struggles and then suddenly understands and does well. It is particualrly so when it is a child that has a learning difficulty, who needs to have lessons adapted to suit their style.

I see so many children in schools that do not get the help because they are not labelled and with inclusion, so many children that need help fall under the net.

It is sad.

cat

Post secret

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 15:03:53

I must admit I am getting addictive to this site http://www.postsecret.blogspot.com/

Once i log on on a Sunday I take a look.

And today there was something that made me think "Yes, I can relate to that"

Now I don't have a learning disability. I do have problems hearing sometimes but that wasn't at school. At school I was your average child, struggled to understand things, particularly maths and often told that I couldn't be that stupid as the teacher tried yet again to explain to me that days mathematical problem. In fact I struggle with most things but came out of school with good 'O' level results despite this and managed to get a job I enjoy doing (though stressful at times). But one thing it taught me was no child is stupid. Ok they have problems, they may struggle, they may be labelled with the latest problem e.g. dyslexia, autism etc, BUT they are not stupid they just have to learn at a different level. They have to be encouraged, nurtured and you need patience to do this. It is rewarding when any child struggles and then suddenly understands and does well. It is particualrly so when it is a child that has a learning difficulty, who needs to have lessons adapted to suit their style.

I see so many children in schools that do not get the help because they are not labelled and with inclusion, so many children that need help fall under the net.

It is sad.

cat

Going AWOL

by faffajane @ 04/02/07 - 11:59:11

That is exactly how I felt yesterday, not being able to log onto here and answer messages.

I went into work yesterday for a couple of hours - well that was what it was supposed to be, instead it ended up being 7 hours or sorting, clearing rubbish and making sure that the pen pots had everything that was needed in them so that the kids wouldn't whine about how they didn't have this, that and the other!

It was noticeable how many TAs were in yesterday as well, the same ones that always turn up regardless of the occasion, and who wasn't there. The ones that haven't stayed late this week or worked extra hours. We all have families, we all have children, we all have a life, yet some TAs did manage to come in children in tow, so that they could help in some small way.

Teachers running around like headless chickens trying to get planning done for the two days the inspectors are in, double checking what they have done is suitable, making sure all the resources are there, the photocopying is done, and everyone is singing from the same hymn sheet so to speak.

Manic? Yes, but it was fun, everyone had some music on, it was relaxed, lunch was provided (sandwiches, rolls and filling) though I stopped long enough to have a cup of tea and a slice of french bread before I continued on making sure the marking was up to date (which it was, but you have to make sure:) )

By the time I got home yesterday then went out and got the weeks shopping, I was exhausted and lounged in front of the telly chilling out, ready meal eaten and a glass of wine.

This morning my back is killing me, the sun is out, there is a chill in the air and the house is a wreck. Why can't ppl put things in the bin. Would it have hurt someone to put the hoover over the floor or pick up a duster? Would it have hurt to put the dishwasher on, hang the washing on the airer and put some washing in the machine?

Well that is the fun I will have today, though I may think sod it, why bother.

I will be glad when this week is over, only 4 working days until half term for me now:)

Smichen, hope you had a good birthday party yesterday:)

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