Spread your wings and fly away

Nicked from MenoMama

1. Love is…………………………..Laughter, fun, companionship, trusting

2. I wish I………………………..could lose weight without dieting

3. Why did I…………………..Eat that sandwich - it wasn't very nice and is now repeating on me.

4. The last time I………saw a good film was ages ago, must phone friend and go to cinema

5. The first time I……..saw my husband I fell in love

6. I hate it when………..I can't find what I am looking for

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and we
could all do with a little calm. By following the simple advice I read in
an article, I have finally found inner peace.

The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish off all the
things you have started".

So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and hadn't
finished.

And before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of red
wine, a bottle of white wine, the Baileys, three Bacardi Breezers, the
Jack Daniels, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of
chocolates.

You have no idea how bloody good I feel. You must pass this on to
those you feel are in need of inner peace.

When Dan found out he was going to inherit a fortune when
his sickly Father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So
one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most
beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her beauty took his breath
away.

"I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as he walked up
to her
"but in just a week or two, my father will die, and I'll inherit 20 million dollars."

Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and, three
days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much smarter than men

A variety of quotes from famous people on their opinion of sex and
love.

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural,
wholesome things that money can buy."

Tom Clancy

"You know 'that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."

Steve Martin

"Having sex is like playing bridge If you don't have a good partner,
you'd better have a good hand."

Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday
night."

Rodney Dangerfield

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual
arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz
SL600."

Lynn Lavner

"Leaving sex to the feminists, is like letting your dog vacation at the
taxidermist."

Matt Barry

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are
unimportant."

George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole
relationships."

Sharon Stone

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex ---no matter what she's
reading."

Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson

" Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,
but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."

Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)

"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's
genitals through his wallet."

Robin Williams

"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the
only time of the month that I can be myself."

Roseanne

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable
undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other
women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men
are just grateful."

Robert De Niro

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are
having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe
swelling. So what's the problem?"

Dustin Hoffman

"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, I
know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked."

Jerry Seinfeld

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't
like and just give her a house."

Rod Stewart

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only
enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams

This is exactly how I feel this morning. Feeling out of sorts and not quite with it.

Have to face WI which does not bode well and then pop into town to get a friend a birthday present for her 40th. Just wish I knew what to get her!

Oh well hope you all have a good day