Spread your wings and fly away

So today, after saying I felt better, which I did, I had a dreadful thought.

I am back at work on Wednesday.

A stupid day to start back, but there we are nothing can be done about that.

So today I set to and got some shopping for the week and did some washing and cleared the mountain of ironing.

I would have much rather have sat and sewed, there is so much to do, but at least tomorrow I can sit, relax and sew as everything is done.

Looking at the windows and the over which I still haven't cleaned as I planned during this holiday, I thought bugger it, it can wait. So looks like my weekend will be taken up with that if I can be bothered.

I also managed to make a meat pie for dinner as well in between cleaing the ironing pile and all the other things I had to do today.

So pat on the back for me.

So now I am going to sit down in front of the telly, with my sewing and relax with a lovely glass of chilled wine.

Oh and managed to fit in some exercise as well today

A very old man lay dying in his bed. In death's doorway, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs.

He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven.

There, spread out upon newspapers on the kitchen table was literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table. The aged and withered hand, shaking, made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.

"Stay out of those," she said, "they're for the funeral!!!"

This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.

Dear Diary,
For my sixtieth birthday this year, my daughter Rachel (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

MONDAY :
Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring! Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week-!!

TUESDAY :
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air - then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda's rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT-!! It's a whole new life for me.

WEDNESDAY :
The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.
Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning; and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair 'monster'. Why the h* would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other s* too.

THURSDAY :
Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late, it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. She sent another skinny b**** to find me. Then, as punishment, she put me on the rowing machine -- which I sank.

FRIDAY :
I hate that b**** Belinda more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little cheerleader. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it.

Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the D*** barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

SATURDAY :
Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to
even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.

SUNDAY :
I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my daughter Rachel (the little s***) will choose a gift for me that is fun -- like a root canal or a hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!

After a weekend of suffering from a massive migraine that left me feeling low, and wanting to throw up all the time, I managed to wake up this morning feeling a better than I did though there is still a slight headache to deal with. The main thing is I am not feeling sick with it.

Knew it had reached its hiatus yesterday morning when hubby opened the curtains and the light hurt like hell - he nicknamed me the vampire!!

So today gingerly managed to force some cereal down my throat and do not have the urge to bring it all back up again, so must be on the mend

Thank you to everyone who sent me get well messages on my last post

Today is bright, some sunshine out there, but an autumnal chill in the air. I have to talk eldest into getting his hair cut, do some ironing and housework and start preparing for the start of another term. Summer holidays have gone to quickly, we are all back on Wednesday and I am not looking forward to it. Still it pays some of the bills so have to go in

Been trying to decide what I want to do in the future. There is no doubt once my youngest starts high school it will be better for me to go back to work full time or at least find a better paying job, but I really enjoy working in schools, though not as a teacher. I am considering asking if I can increase my hours but not sure if I really want to. Ah well I have two years to decide yet and anyway at the moment it is convenient for me to do what I am doing for now

Right enough rambling, better get under that shower, drag a 15 year old from his bed and get a move on before the day passes and I have done nothing again

Have a good day wherever you are