There isn't a day that goes by when we don't hear about a shooting or stabbing, or beating, somewhere in the country, where the victim is a teenager, young man, family man etc.
Every time it is mentioned, phone ins are held across the land where people phone in and say that the parents must know what their child did, people in the community must know who did it, someone must step forward and turn whoever did it in.
Everyday we read about it on the internet or in the papers, the letters pages full of people saying turn them in, do something. We look at our kids and hug them, thankful it wasn't them that was killed, them that did the hurting. Thankful it wasn't us.
Then one woman stands up and does what everyone wants - she turns her kids in after hearing them boast about what they had done the night before. Carol Saldinack went to the police and told them of her sons crime. As a result her family have disowned her and she has been receiving threats ever since.
Radio 5 this morning had a phone in asking "Would you shop your kids?" and lo and behold, those same people that for weeks have been shouting that something should be done about these killings, parents must know etc etc etc were condemming her for what she had done. Fair play they were outnumbered by people, parents, who said yes they would do what she had done, but there were the few who would make your blood boil - one who even though he has no children said that he would teach his children not to do that in the first place therefore there would be no problem!!
Ok all of us that are parents would love to think that our children are little darlings and wonderful members of society when they are our without our guidance. In reality though how do we know how they behave? Both my child have been taught, from a young age, that every action they take, good or bad, has a consequence. I would like to think that when my eldest is out with his mates he is as sensible as he is at home. I would like to think that he wouldn't get into trouble. I would like to think that if he did that it would be because of someone else and not him, but I also know that in reality neither of my children are angels. They make mistakes, everyone does. Most of us at some point in our lives have done silly things when we have had too much to drink. I know someone who is a lovely person but has a complete personality transplant when he has a few too many to drink, and yet it is not only the drink that causes youngsters to behave irresponsibly - peer pressure counts for a lot as well, a person's personality - how they cope in confrontational situations. I dread my son going out and probably like most worry about him until he is safe at home again - and this is during the day when he is just going shopping with his friends - can you imagine what I will be like if he is having a night on the town?
With any action comes a consequence. Would I shop my child to the police if I knew he had done something wrong?
Yes, but only after I had talked to him and encouraged him to turn himself in, if he didn't then I would do it for him. It doesn't mean I would stop loving either of them, it would be a very hard thing to do and it would be something I would have to live with for the rest of my life, but then again I could honestly say I could not live with myself if I knew he had done something so serious as Carol Saldinack's sons had done. The woman has my admiration because it must be one of the hardest things to do.
